the first post ...

I have recently started a journey that I wish to share with you ... Of course at some point i will have to go back and explain how all this started ... how my journey to dominance started ... first back in high school, but then again with earnest as an adult. But more interesting, i am sure, is how did i become a man who longs to be on his knees to a strong Woman ... a man who is teased and denied by that Woman ... his orgasm owned by Her.

But i will leave that for my next few entries here. For today i want to share a thought on all this ... and a desire. My thought centers around the few Dommes i have encountered over the years ... and a basic difference i see between their views and my views on a D/s type relationship. As a dominant ... i was a strong proponent of behavior modification. But it was used not only to have my wishes granted ... but to encourage positive changes for the woman that i was with. My quote was ...
"I believe that a dominants role, is to be that safe place a Woman would crawl to .. to become all that He and she ... desire that she become".

I dont see that so much with dominant Women. I know this is a generalization ... but for the most part it seems to me the focus is on ... it isnt about the male submissive ... it is about the MISTRESS. What the Mistress wants ... what the Mistress expects. i understand the primary focus of needs and pleasure should be the Mistress. However, it doesn't seem to be about mutual happiness and enjoyment for both of them ... it seems to focus exclusively on the Mistress.

An example ... during an extended period of orgasm denial ... a Mistress and i had a conversation about when She would allow me to cum next. i realized during the conversation, that there was no consideration for my pleasure what so ever. Any comment on my part about kissing her or touching Her ... resulted in comments about only if and when i say so ... this is NOT about Your desires!

Now maybe I am/was a different kind of dominant ... and i know my above comments are generalizations ... but it seems to me that female Dominants are overly focused on their desires, with little to no concern about the male submissive. A female friend who is submissive ... and has been in the lifestyle a long time ... said it this way when i discussed this with her ... "Most Fem Doms I know ... milk sub men"

Desire ...
A recent desire
I am not allowed to cum for two weeks or so ... so that i am in quite a state of need and denial. My desire is to be tied on my back ... with my legs back ... so my cock and ball area ... as well as my ass ... are completely open and exposed to my Mistress.
Her ... with only a feather ... and maybe Her breath or the ligthest touch of a finger nail ... tormenting the area around my balls ... without even touching my testicles ... Avoiding my cock completely at the beginning ... and tickling that area between my ass and my balls. She said she would like to do this to me for 2 to 3 hours. Building my need ... taking me to deeper levels of ... teasing and denial ...